its no secret,
these days, I am all into parenting, needless to say id like a partner,
the loneliness I feel at times when I just need to rely on someone
my girl needs that dad time where she is the attention, or when those days where my illness takes a hold and I just want to cry, I need someone,
I know in my heart, my decisions are what I feel is right
I try to do it all i can
I see a pattern where I make my assumption that her father will not e the man or ppartner I would need to succeed and also remain happy
the things I ponder at 2am,
such things, that cross my mind pulsing like a headache,
its no headache, my heart hurts for the unrealistic image that remains ifI continue doing what I do for the wrong person, the one person I am doing right for is my daughter and thats who matters in the end,
she needs experiences that would help shape her into a persson she will like in the future, I need her happy with who she is, the way her father is, hes not a person I would like her to look up too solely, ecause down the road she will find a man, I dont want her to think its okay to feel as hurt as I do one day, to feel solely at fault, She and I need to grow and I am no longer growing as a person here I make my decision final,
I know I am important to others, I am worth so much more than this, my potential is there, the opportunities here do not fit, my heart does retain a spot somewhere though someone does care for me deeply I will not feel shame though my daughters father will, I will hear “cheating whore” again
I am in that place, where I want something so much my heart is ready to jump, leap of faith, I made a post a few months ago how I was called a cheater, no, that didnt exist, I am not actually one, I fell for a man who has done so much for me already, he makes me sing, smile laugh and feel i am a goddess, I know this is my site and I will write what I want to There is no one else who has made me feel happy.
His name is Michael and I will commit myself to never let him down.
He is the Garfield to my pookie